Spring, Frühling, primavera, Весна, wiosna, printemps...

Looks nice, huh? beautiful I would say... Just that I'm tired... I'm so damn tired of frost, cold and snow. It's the end of March for God's sake!! I wanna green grass and warm sun :(

This damned days

Isn't it bloody ironic to be waiting for some classes for few months and get ill two days before? I have again a very sexy voice of a mature witch. And my throat feels like someone was trying to suffocate me at night. Just that I can't remember such situation.
Well then... Though I'm sorry, work with patient with schizophrenic diagnosis will need to wait till I stop being a patient with flu.

(This video is a bit crappy, but I like the song...)

just complaining

My grandma is always very interested in talking with me. Just miraculously our converastion always ends up with me saying nothing...

- So what else will you tell me?
- Err I don't know...
- Did you do a lot of sightseeing?
- Er... yeah, quite a lot.
- Did you went to the theater?
- No. Why? Why do you ask?
- No, nothing... just that when we went to Russia we went to the theater... We've seen a lot on that trip...


- Whate else can I give you? I can make you pancakes!
- No grandma, please, I don't want anything else. I will just eat the cake, ok?
- OK... hm... and what do they eat there, in England?
- What shall they eat? The same as we do. You know grandma, now we have globalization... They have even a Polish Shop there. You can buy "pierogi".
- Oh! Maybe I will make you dumplings?!

sun, cofee and a blanket

I feel so tired and lazy... I don't feel like doing anything. Reading seems to be to tiring, just to lie down is too boring. So I'm sitting here, covered with blanket and with a cup of fake cofee.
Yesterday I couldn't sleep again. Maybe because before going to bed I was watching some report, that even made me cry a bit. I saw our ombudsman for children talking that homosexuality is a plauge that is coming from the western Europe, and we have to stop it. Don't let it spread inside our country. That hurt.
Then those young people, future of our nation, shouting about "normalcy" ? Something about faggots. That only man and woman is a normal family. That homosexuals should get to some therapy to cure their disorders.
A guy, their techie, was having some silly lecture, that sounded completely like in a church. He was talking about being obedient as a most important thing in life. Renunciation is something that will make us stronger and better. Good and abd, are the only criteria. And democracy can not exist.
I was terrified looking at their faces. So focused.
Then on 14th of february they were giving some posters that were saying about love to our country. Some other, funky girls, nearby where calling themselves 'educators' and were talking about contraception. Encouraging to use condoms to stop unwanted pregnancies etc. So those girls went to our heros and gave them something, saying 'with love to neighbors'.
'So for what are the rubbers then?' - asked their spokesman.
'To prevent from HIV, for example.'
He looked disgusted and answered through the bullhorn
'Normal diseases are flu, pneumonia and that things!'
I was even more sad and angry. I wouldn't be, but this youngsters are becoming ministers... they are responsible for our country... :( thinking about it really hurts... They are closing their minds and... no, I won't say anything more.
When I finally mangage to fall asleep I dreamt that I was dead. But as I was a ghost I was trying to let my friends know that I'm still there. I will leave it without comments.

this day has no colours

I'm sitting in my room with empty, cold walls. The desk in front of the window, a lamp, a bed and some boxes with clothes. It's all I have here.
The guy that is making my closet was supposed to come here today. But he didn't. He fell from the stairs, injured his arm and blah blah blah... I guess he just couldn't make it on time. What's the difference anyway. My closet is still not here and all our plans get screwed. Shit happens, I wouldn't bother about it much, but...
But in the morning, when we were going to buy some other stuff to my room some stupid woman was trying to get into the roundabout in front of us. While she should wait. That wouldn't be so bad, that things happens, but she even used a car horn! I have no idea why. I guess she didn't now much about the road rules. But my dad was really pissed off, as it's not the first time this week that someone doesn't know how to drive and still is very self confident.
So I have my second breakfast of anger and bitterness.
Yummy, eat honey, eat.
Taste awful, I have tried to forget about it but that seems impossible.
I'm tired. I don't want to talk. I would like to lyie down, next to Gerardo. Hug him, and just stay like that, listening to a music.
I went to visit my grandma. I know she waits for me everyday. But the sad truth is that there is not much that we can talk about. I like to listen to her sometimes but I don't like to talk about myself.
- What did you have for your lunch?
Oh, I just felt like hugging her. Like I used to when I was a little girl. And even a bit bigger girl. I turned on Fashion tv and we were criticising models. And clothes. I was just trying not to keep up the subject of my grandad. I know she misses him. I know... but what can I do?
I get off from the bus one stop earlier to walk a little. I passed my highschool... so many changes since I've been there last time. Cold wind was mulishly trying to get under my clothes but I didn't care much. Soon there will be real spring. With sun, blue sky and high temperature. In that moment I had good music in my ears and some nice ideas in my head, so why to care about the weather.

Oh.. it got dark. Who cares, this day didn't have colours anyway.

England

I'm sitting on a couch with my feet on a table, feeling like criticizing everyone around, judging their life choices, maybe envy them too. Just one of the bad days. A novelty is that I'm aware why I feel like that. So I know what to do to avoid that. Or rather what NOT to do :) Sometimes it's hard to avoid, but at least I know what I don't want. And that's something, right?

English weather is really strange. I think I liked it more in Spain. Or in Gibraltar, if comparing within UK :)
Well, no point in complaining.

Just enjoy :)